Woo haircuts.

I had to see the ex housemate yesterday. I’d arranged for my old neighbour to collect my mail so that I could pick it up from her and not have to see the wankstaff that kicked me out, but she got home just as I got there, so I was forced to hand her my keys in person instead of leaving them in the letterbox like I’d planned. I’d like to say I kicked her in vagina, stole her wallet and skipped away, but that would be a lie.

I strode up to her, handed her the keys and walked off. She said thanks and started fucking around in the doorway. I didn’t know why she wanted to hang around but ignored her anyway.

I went next door to pick my mail up from the garage, and started walking back to my car when HM came out again and handed me the tablecloth I’d forgotten in my hasty move the weekend before. I said nothing to her, and she was trying her best to keep her bitchy face in place, but it was slipping as I walked away again.

I then drove down to the post office to hand in my mail redirection forms. I only have to go back to HM’s once more to collect mail before the redirection kicks in and then I never have to see her assholey face again.

After the post office I walked to the hairdressers to get my fringe trimmed, as I’ve been having trouble seeing thanks to the wall of hair in my eyes. This hairdresser is at the end of the street where I lived with HM, so both of us went there regularly. When I walked in, Rachel, the hairdresser started yapping away. She asked how I was, and if I liked HM’s new haircut. I stayed pleasant, and said that I did like her hair and rah rah rah. Then Rachel started going on about some guy that was getting his hair cut at the same time as HM, and how HM seemed to take a liking to him.

Apparently, when HM left the hairdressers, she texted Rachel saying “Who was that guy? He was cute.” Rachel started laughing and went on to tell me that the guy was taken, and HM was obviously “on the prowl”. I kept my laughter inside as best as I could, because I sure do love hearing about someone being humiliated after they have been an asshole to me. I was feeling delightfully smug, and was in a much better mood when I left the hairdressers. After that, the drive home was uneventful, as was the rest of the evening. I could launch into a story about how I had to fight a dragon in the backyard, and ended the battle by stabbing the dragon in the eye and then he fell into the pool and drowned, and then I had to drag him out so he didn’t clog the filter, but that’s not very interesting so I’ll leave it at that.